jurian.isabelle@whnt.com
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HUNTSVILLE, ALABAMA -
I have come to the disturbing realization that Hollywood has either hid it's creative writers with Jimmy Hoffa, or have gotten lazy and are now only interested in a profit, no matter how minuscule it is. The result? Find yet another classic or cult horror movie and remake it as inexpensive as possible with a little promotion behind it. At least someone had enough sense to say, "Hey, this Friday the 13th series has been decapitated, (Jason X or Jason Takes Manhattan anyone? Do I have any buyers?) so let's just brand this as a re-boot. In this way, people can feel smart again by saying things like, "Oh, this isn't another remake, they are giving it a fresh re-imagining." Well, they didn't, and as you can tell by now, I'm not a huge fan of this movie.
Friday the 13th attempts to re-energize the classic 80's Jason franchise by combining the original first two films and reusing the exhausted act of systematically killing off all of the characters except one or two to leave room for another sequel. The film's open shows promise when a group of campers accidentally stumble upon the grounds of the infamous Camp Crystal Lake site. One of the five characters tells of the legend of the original Crystal Lake Murders and it's curse, which still haunts the woods. The five teens quickly find the legend is real as all of them, except for a girl, meet their own demise. The surviving girl's brother then launches a personal hunt for his sister after receiving no help from police officials. The audience is then introduced to a group of college kids who are all headed to a vacation cabin belonging to one of the guys' parents. Where is the cabin located? You guessed it. Near Camp Crystal Lake. You can pretty much guess what ensues from there.
This movie is a hot mess. Seeing that they were revamping the series, they could have done so much more to make it interesting. The writers could have added more detailed history about Jason and his mother and made it more suspenseful. Instead, this film opted for the mediocre approach: let's make up for the lack of storyline with cliché, forgettable characters, excessive nudity and sex, strong language, drugs, and loud, obnoxious sound effect cues.
Die hard fans won't be pleased either. You won't get the Jason you remember. Gone is his signature "Chi Chi Chi HA HA HA", and instead of mysteriously appearing from nowhere, Jason has apparently been working out at the gym. He's agile now, and...well, awkward.
The sad part about all of this is that everybody is looking for a new good horror movie. When I come down my stairs at night, I'm not looking for a deformed, hockey mask wearing maniac with a bad case of asthma, I'm looking for a desperate thief that just got laid off and needs money for the rent. How about that for a storyline Hollywood? A recession horror flick where the masked murderer wears an old auto or steel plant uniform. Come with something new, we don't have money to give away. Don't waste ten dollars on this film. Unless of course you're looking for a mild comedy, it's full of laughs.
If you want a scary fright-night, may I advise you to avoid this wretched remake and explore horror movies of the past. See: Exorcist, Rosemary's Baby, the original Halloween, Candyman, even Snakes on a Plane gives this movie a run for its life.
Two sunglasses for me. It wasn't walk-of-the-theater bad, but I wouldn't pay money to see it.
Friday the 13th attempts to re-energize the classic 80's Jason franchise by combining the original first two films and reusing the exhausted act of systematically killing off all of the characters except one or two to leave room for another sequel. The film's open shows promise when a group of campers accidentally stumble upon the grounds of the infamous Camp Crystal Lake site. One of the five characters tells of the legend of the original Crystal Lake Murders and it's curse, which still haunts the woods. The five teens quickly find the legend is real as all of them, except for a girl, meet their own demise. The surviving girl's brother then launches a personal hunt for his sister after receiving no help from police officials. The audience is then introduced to a group of college kids who are all headed to a vacation cabin belonging to one of the guys' parents. Where is the cabin located? You guessed it. Near Camp Crystal Lake. You can pretty much guess what ensues from there.
This movie is a hot mess. Seeing that they were revamping the series, they could have done so much more to make it interesting. The writers could have added more detailed history about Jason and his mother and made it more suspenseful. Instead, this film opted for the mediocre approach: let's make up for the lack of storyline with cliché, forgettable characters, excessive nudity and sex, strong language, drugs, and loud, obnoxious sound effect cues.
Die hard fans won't be pleased either. You won't get the Jason you remember. Gone is his signature "Chi Chi Chi HA HA HA", and instead of mysteriously appearing from nowhere, Jason has apparently been working out at the gym. He's agile now, and...well, awkward.
The sad part about all of this is that everybody is looking for a new good horror movie. When I come down my stairs at night, I'm not looking for a deformed, hockey mask wearing maniac with a bad case of asthma, I'm looking for a desperate thief that just got laid off and needs money for the rent. How about that for a storyline Hollywood? A recession horror flick where the masked murderer wears an old auto or steel plant uniform. Come with something new, we don't have money to give away. Don't waste ten dollars on this film. Unless of course you're looking for a mild comedy, it's full of laughs.
If you want a scary fright-night, may I advise you to avoid this wretched remake and explore horror movies of the past. See: Exorcist, Rosemary's Baby, the original Halloween, Candyman, even Snakes on a Plane gives this movie a run for its life.
Two sunglasses for me. It wasn't walk-of-the-theater bad, but I wouldn't pay money to see it.
